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    16/06/2008

    今天玩游戏,突然被感动……

    今天中午趁吃饭的时候,玩了一个叫做有爱心的沙和尚的小游戏,主要说的是玩家控制一个有爱心的沙和尚,在一块田里面散步,四周有盛开的花朵、明媚的阳光和温暖的颜色,还会时不时的跑出一两只小猫、小狗或者小兔子的小动物。玩家要抓紧时间浇花,爱抚、喂养周围跑来的小动物。这样玩家就可以得到爱心值,攒够了爱心值就可以过关。“沙和尚”外形笨拙,甚至有点丑陋,他本可以不喂养这些小动物,但是每次经过小动物的时候,他都满怀爱心的去关爱着这些小动物。配上温暖的着色和“卡农”,一阵阵温暖由心而来。

    一个很简单的小游戏,甚至有点傻,操作、画面也很简单。却着实感动了我。

    回想起我自己,我已经毕业快三年了,也工作快三年了。这三年里,我总是感慨我失去什么、变得如何如何事故……其实扪心自问,这些也许真的是我的借口,我自己堕落的借口。我给我自己的冷漠、无知穿上了一件很厚很虚伪的外衣。也许我真的无法回到从前了,也许我沾沾自喜“我成熟了”,我不再勇敢、拿得起放得下,我开始变的懦弱、胆小。我记得06年初的时候,我多么勇敢,我一个人来到北京创世界,现在的我却不敢再独自回家。我开始对别人多了很多评论,却不在去严格要求我自己。我现在依然在听摇滚乐,更多的时候却更像个听者,更多的关注了器材和音色,却忘记了最本质的东西……

    有时候我想,我不是这个样子的,我要改变。可是到头来呢,我还是什么都没变。还自欺欺人的“太忙,没时间。”其实,又很多东西很简单的,只要多点精力,多点投入,就可以做个原来的自我。难道生活真的把我压垮,难道我真的开始怕这怕那,难道我真的开始妥协。

    “沙和尚”,也许在现代的社会,你会被人称作“傻和尚”,但是你是好样的,你敢爱敢恨,我敬仰你。我收拾了一下我自己的心境,前方的道路还是很长,还有很多事需要处理,我不要再逃避,我要当机立断,斩钉截铁。

    难道生活真的把我压垮?难道我真的开始怕这怕那?难道我真的开始妥协?

    我不……

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